Come one, come all! Some of you that have been around know how this goes, but for those of you who don't... Gather 'round kids, for it's ( Tales of the PAAAAST! )

-RJ, "What in the name of Geekdom and it's holiness Wil Wheaton is wrong with you?"

(Usual x-posts.)

Gather 'round kids and this is tax deductible... Just not on our taxes. It's time for yet another ( Tales of the PAAAAST! )

-RJ, and quit using the donation box as a trash can.

(X-posts: gasstation_hell, customers_suck.)

Gather 'round kids and... is that eggnog spiked? Because if it is, then thanks! It's needed, for it's another holly jolly ( Tales of the PAAAAST )

Side note: I'm supposed to wear a santa hat while at work. And yes, I wear a black santa hat. No, it's not because I'm a grinch, evil, an atheist, a special snowflake, or (as it was so lovingly put) "a fucking jew." There is only one reason why I wear a black santa hat...

Because I want to. Unless someone can show me a law stating it has to be red, then you can blow me... While I'm wearing my black santa hat. >D

- RJ, Merry Whatthefuckevermas.

(X-posts: gasstation_hell, customers_suck.)

o/` Rollin', rollin', rollin'... The lottery keeps on rollin'. Rollin' on over again, FUCK ME.

*ahem* Gather 'round kids, and let's put down our lucky balls for this ( Tales of the PAAAAST )

Odd thing: Lately I've been getting people walking into the store while we're still very much open, lights on, sign says open, the whole 9 yards... Then they ask me "... are you still open?"

I've gotten to the point where I'm going to start saying no just to see what happens.

- RJ, I'm a special snowflake... because I'm made of yellow snow. >)
(X-posts: gasstation_hell, customers_suck.)

Gather 'round kids, and break out the kitty pics and Impact font. For it can be ( Tales of the PAAAAST teim now plees. )

- RJ, the only time I deviate from to path of win is when I use MapQuest.

(X-posts: customers_suck, gasstation_hell.)

Extra, extra! Read all about it! Warsaw was raw! A Toyota's a Toyota! Now I see bees I won! All this and sports in the late edition of ( Tales of the PAAAAST )

- RJ, HP SPOILER: The last two words in the book are "The end." >:O

(X-posts: customers_suck, gasstation_hell)

We're keeping it short, real, to the point, and no lj-cut for this Tales of the PAAAAST!

Lady comes in on a Friday, looking for a specific local paper that only comes out on Thursdays and Sundays. Our hero tells her that it doesn't come in save for those two days and if it's not with the rest of the papers then it's out.

The lady then whines "But you haven't gotten any in since Thursday."

...... Dr. Counter? Mr. Head would like an emergency meeting with you.

-RJ, Earth logic has achieved escape velocity.

(Usual X-posts: customers_suck, gasstation_hell.)

Gather 'round kids to a thing of mine that's been somewhat duplicated, kinda imitated, but not fully ripped off. (Probably because I haven't really made it that big yet. ;_;) For it is yet another ( Tales from the PAAAAST!©®™¿±∞ )

-RJ, How in the hell does Rushuna Tendo hold all those bullets there?

(X-posts: customers_suck, gasstation_hell.)

Gather 'round kids, and prepare for the extreme excitement that's expected when you enter into one of these entries of unexplained idioticy! (Excelsior!) For this is a golden #50 ( Tales of the PAAAAST! )

- RJ, in geek before geek was in.

(X-posts: gasstation_hell, customers_suck.)

Gather 'round kids, and prepare to recite you Latin alphabet backwards, while touching your knee to your eye, while dancing on a crack. It's time for ( Tales of the PAAAAST! )

- RJ, I need to call Roto-Rooter to clear out my Internet tubes.

(X-post whorin': customers_suck, gasstation_hell, talesofthepaast.)